I get asked these questions all the time:
- What book do you recommend?
- Which book is best?
- What’s the Al-Anon “big book”?
- What book do you start with?
Problem is, there’s no hard and fast answer for any of these. For AA people, it’s pretty easy – the entire program is in the “big book” Alcoholics Anonymous after which the program and the fellowship are named, not the other way around. So that’s where you start.
The Al-Anon program grew organically among groups of spouses waiting for their alcoholic loved ones to get out of meetings. They found that adopting the Steps for themselves brought healing and relief, but they knew that it was a different program, because the family disease manifests differently. For us, there can be no one answer, no single right way. That’s reflected in our literature, which came after the program, not before.
I find it helpful to approach Conference Approved Literature with purpose in mind. So here’s a chart of purposes and what literature I think is best for each purpose. This is my experience, strength, and hope. Other people will have other opinions. Take what you like and leave the rest.
Purpose | Title |
---|---|
Gaining basic familiarity with the program and how it works. | How Al-Anon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics |
Working all three Legacies (Steps, Traditions, Concepts) in depth. |
|
Detailed study of the Steps and Traditions. | Al-Anon’s Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (Revised) |
Immediate relief during an upsetting situation. | Consult the index in
or indeed any CAL |
Daily reading – dated entries written by a variety of Al-Anons. | Courage to Change |
Daily reading – dated entries written mostly by spouses of alcoholics. | One Day at a Time |
Daily reading – dated entries written by adult children of alcoholics. | Hope for Today |
One method of working the 4th Step. |
|
Healthy ways of living with an alcoholic spouse. | The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage |
Developing healthy relationships. | Discovering Choices |
Coping with loss – death, divorce, relocation, etc. | Opening Our Hearts, Transforming Our Losses |
Dealing with crises. | …In All Our Affairs: Making Crises Work for You |
Recovering from growing up with alcoholism. |
|
Facing challenges brought on by sobriety in a family member. | Living with Sobriety |
Developing spirituality. | As We Understood… |
Furthering recovery through service. | When I Got Busy, I Got Better |
Understanding the history and development of the Al-Anon program. |
|
It’s not a book, but I also highly recommend The Forum, Al-Anon’s monthly magazine of experience, strength, and hope. Each issue gives me fresh tools and approaches to working my program. This publication is frequently described as “like having a meeting in my pocket” and I find this to be true for me too.